CRISPS FROM SCRATCH
You can actually slice up a potato and whack it in the microwave to make your own crisps! Some tips from the pros:
soak and rinse in cold water to remove the starch. Two verses of Crazy in Love and the dramatic bridge section should do it.
get your slices as thin as you can.
they take about 6 minutes in two 3 minute batches, conveniently the same time it takes to watch Alison Hammond pushing a sailor into the Mersey (twice) (trust us).